This is me

it is finally october..yay..even though im like 8 days late…it shouldnt matter.

So to my readers…..u know….all 0 of u…how are you?

The past month, things have changed and something havent.

Friendships were redefined and im still fat….so yea

I know I am late but I would like to wish my 2 readers a happy new year.

 This year started off with a bang so to say.

I came out to my friends at a party! a new years party! lol

and no i wasn’t drunk..maybe a lil tipsy but I was well aware of what I was going to do.

So yea I’m gay.

My friend asked me if I was sure because I had never done anything with the same sex…(little does she know) and how would i possibley know and that I couldnt be sure.

She then proceeds to tell me how she cannot see me with annyone..Not a Guy or  a Girl and I was hurt. Was not mad at her, but I am hurt because i believe her.

Can People be destined not to find love?

The fact that she can’t see me with anyone is striking a chord. I do commend her because she was being honest and i truly believe that my other friends believe that. See I hang out with my friends a lot and i never really told them my type( before they knew the truth) and I think that kind of made an imprint in their heads that I am just a great friend, that my personality could not mesh with anyone.

I am not what the stereotype thinks of gays. Truly am not.Overwight/ugly/ who knows what else.  Hence why my confidence is low to the ground.

I know my friends know this and hence why they may neglect to try to hook me up with anyone or w/e. It is sad that they are happy, with their relationships and crap..or sexual prowless..but hey what can u do right?

Well anyways peeps…sorry to depress u with this depressing blog…just how im feeling today.

Yes another weight loss blog.

blah

blah

at this point

Went to the doctor and i have to lose weight, but i just dont know how..even though she told me what i have to do.

Truth is, i dont know if i can give up all of that.

perils of life

that is my diet

Can never stick to it.

Want to lose it cant feels bad when i see the fit.

I know I can do it if i apply but its so hard

no workout buddy

hate looking in the mirror

makes me sad

how wide i am

will be alone forever

unfortunate i guess

I know back in July I said i would be starting a diet…and that lasted a week…Tomorrow I am starting a new one. even tho my success rate will probably be low. Its the whole exercise thing that bothers me. I am not good at it. The food thing is a problem but not as big as u would think. i can eat sandwiches and not fries and i mostly drink water…even though soda is creeping in again. But “dirty” chips is oh so so good.

 I look like frankenstein!

I am on a diet. some days i do good, other days i fall off the wagon. It sucks when you are at home all the time, so all you do is look for something to eat and when you do find something it is far from healthy.

This is really hard. I am serious about losing weight, but when reality hits you and you realize you are hungry and that when you eat one slice of pizza it turns into 5 slices, then it becomes a problem.

Hopefully when I start my job on monday, it forces me to not to eat constantly. Sadly if it is anything like my last job, then ill be eating fast food everyday.

I started my diet yesterday(monday). I do not know if i can do this!!!

Starting monday I am embarking on a weight loss journey. I want to lose 30-40lbs.

I want to get a new fashion style. I am tired of being drab and fat!

I pray that i can do this as this will be hard as I love food.

 I just dont want to lose weight and look weird. I did not know Kyle when he was bigger, but looking at the pictures, he’s lost weight and he looks good know. I want people to see me and be like “omg u look so good” not “omg u look weird, u remind me of kelly price”

 That would be horrible.